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Old Feb 4, 2022, 10:18 PM   #1
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KAC
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Default Why is everyone a snowflake these days?

You say words like pussy, you get ban threats.
You use the term guys in office, people say you are not inclusive even though women use the term guys routinely.
You say something about hard work, people start taking mental health leaves.
You mention that you are doing poorly at work, they make an employee relations case against you.
You promote someone because they delivered exceptional impact, people start to think that you are biased or doing favoritism.
You fire a couple of women who were abusing the system and as per policy, people think you are a feminazy and sexist.
You tell someone your perspective about where the company is going and how you can remedy the situation, you get that you are not mission aligned or really cynical.

In the past 3-4 years it seems the workplace has changed completely.

Wtf is going on?
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 10:34 PM   #2
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For me it's happened over the last several years, as I moved into management and then a directorship. Previously, as an individual contributor, I had much more flexibility to have fun & interesting lunchtime conversations with all of my coworkers about politics, religion, opinions, etc. Growing into leadership though, people kept giving me gentle reminders that my words carry much more weight, and it may put an unfair amount of pressure on people when I carry on those same kinds of conversations. There's an imbalance of power, and leaders have to always be conscientious of that.

It makes me sad, because I always enjoyed the more relaxed atmosphere you get when everyone is basically peers, and you could foster a team environment where it really felt like a family. But when you add in a power imbalance from being in a leadership role, over time you also have to make relationships more formal, more transactional. It's less fun, and more business. You can still have good relationships, but I've found that I have to reserve "friendships" for others in my company who are near my same level.

-----------

btw, I have had several interesting conversations about calling women "guys", and there's not really a good answer. Younger women don't like being called "women", older women don't like being called "girls". A couple of women at work suggested "ladies", but I just can't say it without it sounding like the Old Spice guy, and we all agreed that wasn't going to work either. I've found it works best if I say "you guys", as somehow that seems to be slightly more gender neutral than just "guys".
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 10:38 PM   #3
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Yeah it's ****ing awful. I know several people in USA who at the office/work refuse to be mentoring a woman 1 on 1 (or hell being in a room with one alone at work) because of warranted fear of being cancelled. It doesn't even matter if they do/don't do anything, a single world from them will cancel them for good, and in a case of he said/she said it will always side with she said. Witty banter among your friends is also something you absolutely shut down for fear of being branded racist/sexist/transphobic/whatever, and everyone really is starting to look out for what they say.
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 10:44 PM   #4
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Yeah it's ****ing awful. I know several people in USA who at the office/work refuse to be mentoring a woman 1 on 1 (or hell being in a room with one alone at work) because of warranted fear of being cancelled. It doesn't even matter if they do/don't do anything, a single world from them will cancel them for good, and in a case of he said/she said it will always side with she said. Witty banter among your friends is also something you absolutely shut down for fear of being branded racist/sexist/transphobic/whatever, and everyone really is starting to look out for what they say.
Bro I've heard FAR worse things about Cancuckistan lately. In your country it looks like 90% are aligned politically.

Edit, I forgot to add: Aren't you self-employed? That's what I did after I had a horrible time applying to Canada. I applied to MULTIPLE Canadian studios and somehow didn't get the job even after getting really positive vibes from the interviewers and them LITERALLY saying something to the effect of "Oh don't worry, have have other candidates but unless there's an issue in the budget or something DRASTICALLY changes you are a shoe-in." I later got a simple email saying a simple "at this time blah blah blah." I have 3 friends (one guy, two women) of mine who worked at 2 of those places where I applied. Two of them work in HR-ish departments and one of them works as part of the team. From what they said I was apparently not "ethnic" enough. I think you guys call it visible minority. It pissed me off so much since I am in a country where people make like $400 USD a month and the top salary in my profession is like $1200 USD. Apparently I have it rougher than other "minorities," EVEN THOUGH I AM TECHNICALLY ONE and was born and raised in a "third world country," but my skin color doesn't match or whatever. I was astounded, it was racist AF. I had read about it before and I thought that while it likely existed it was probably a minority of cases.
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 10:48 PM   #5
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Well thanks to the pandemic you don’t have to be 1:1 with a woman in the same room. I am also avoiding any form of commentary these days. I talk about work and rarely joke to men either. I have only one person that I can trust and both of us joke about tons of stuff at work. Pretty sure if someone heard us we will be fired/cancelled/burnt in pit with magma/or put on next jet to moon without oxygen. I even call him a pussy every time he complains there is too much work to do (which is like every day). In return he calls me fat. It’s all good.

I do say hello everyone or try to use gender neutral terms but hey guys is something that always slips out especially on zoom as only guys have video on for some reason.

Anyways, it is stupid. The level of entitlement is crazy and I am thinking about how I will survive the next 20 years doing jobs.
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 10:55 PM   #6
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Bro I've heard FAR worse things about Cancuckistan lately. In your country it looks like 90% are aligned politically.

Edit, I forgot to add: Aren't you self-employed? That's what I did after I had a horrible time applying to Canada. I applied to MULTIPLE Canadian studios and somehow didn't get the job even after getting really positive vibes from the interviewers and them LITERALLY saying something to the effect of "Oh don't worry, have have other candidates but unless there's an issue in the budget or something DRASTICALLY changes you are a shoe-in." I later got a simple email saying a simple "at this time blah blah blah." I have 3 friends (one guy, two women) of mine who worked at 2 of those places where I applied. Two of them work in HR-ish departments and one of them works as part of the team. From what they said I was apparently not "ethnic" enough. I think you guys call it visible minority. It pissed me off so much since I am in a country where people make like $400 USD a month and the top salary in my profession is like $1200 USD. Apparently I have it rougher than other "minorities," EVEN THOUGH I AM TECHNICALLY ONE and was born and raised in a "third world country," but my skin color doesn't match or whatever. I was astounded, it was racist AF. I had read about it before and I thought that while it likely existed it was probably a minority of cases.
Fortunately i'm self employed, so I haven't had to deal with it personally thus far (but a number of discord servers I used to talk in have gone absolutely bonkers with PC policing). For that same reason I haven't dealt with it much in Canada, but I know how crazy it got here too (still not as bad as Australia, but yeah). The whole honking trudeau thing has been great.
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 11:08 PM   #7
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Fortunately i'm self employed, so I haven't had to deal with it personally thus far (but a number of discord servers I used to talk in have gone absolutely bonkers with PC policing). For that same reason I haven't dealt with it much in Canada, but I know how crazy it got here too (still not as bad as Australia, but yeah). The whole honking trudeau thing has been great.
100% I hope the Honkening is a wakeup call to Canada. I like you guys being nice but you are FAR too trusting, holy ****. I understand why though, you guys basically lived in utopia, compared to most of the world, for decades. I's also creepy to watch your state-run channels basically doing propaganda for the citizenry. It angers me because I want Canada (and the US) to succeed, I've visited before in my youth and it was a beautiful, beautiful place.
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If you must listen to country [music], play it backwards. You get your woman back, the dog comes back to life, Momma pops out from under the train, and it stops raining. :)
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 11:25 PM   #8
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For me it's happened over the last several years, as I moved into management and then a directorship. Previously, as an individual contributor, I had much more flexibility to have fun & interesting lunchtime conversations with all of my coworkers about politics, religion, opinions, etc. Growing into leadership though, people kept giving me gentle reminders that my words carry much more weight, and it may put an unfair amount of pressure on people when I carry on those same kinds of conversations. There's an imbalance of power, and leaders have to always be conscientious of that.

It makes me sad, because I always enjoyed the more relaxed atmosphere you get when everyone is basically peers, and you could foster a team environment where it really felt like a family. But when you add in a power imbalance from being in a leadership role, over time you also have to make relationships more formal, more transactional. It's less fun, and more business. You can still have good relationships, but I've found that I have to reserve "friendships" for others in my company who are near my same level.
Yeah, one of the reasons I never wanted to be in management. Fortunately I knew my old corporate manager long enough before he got promoted that we were still able to talk about anything which could get interesting as we don't vote the same at all. Still this sorta thing comes with the territory, I've noticed even when folks get promoted to mods here on Rage they tend to post less.
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 11:28 PM   #9
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I see the woke culture made it's way to the middle east. Didn't see that happening.

Soon you'll be asked to include your preferred pronouns in your email sig. I suggest you go with (cock, slap, jiz)
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Old Feb 4, 2022, 11:33 PM   #10
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I see the woke culture made it's way to the middle east. Didn't see that happening.
He probably works at a multinational corp or he isn't actually in the middle east. It's the same in my third world country. Right now it's reserved to multicorps, international/elite schools and university students.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 12:11 AM   #11
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I am in Dubai working for an American company and my boss is a French dude based out of Netherlands. Yeah.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 01:00 AM   #12
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Hey you gais
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 01:41 AM   #13
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I am in Dubai working for an American company and my boss is a French dude based out of Netherlands. Yeah.
There's only 2 things I hate: people who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and french people in the Netherlands.
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To be honest I never even found doom 3 to be scary since I have a big dick since birth.

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Old Feb 5, 2022, 05:11 AM   #14
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OP sounds like a snowflake
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 06:13 AM   #15
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OP sounds like a snowflake
I knew this comment going in…
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 06:13 AM   #16
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People Suck.

This is why I refuse to manage.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 06:35 AM   #17
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The world will always change over time. Adapt or sit down. Whining about it isn't going to reverse the course.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 07:10 AM   #18
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You say words like pussy, you get ban threats.
You say that, you continue to break forum rules, you get gone.

We have Discord Rage where off topic is not as family friendly as this place.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 07:49 AM   #19
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Yea things have changed for the worse (and some good).

Social media has proven we as humans are fcked.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 08:13 AM   #20
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I don't agree with banning/canceling someone under any circumstances - aside from anything related to threats of violence, etc. Just seems too much like reverse fascism to me.

IMO just let people say what they're going to say and they'll eventually cancel themselves as no one will want to associate or take them seriously. It doesn't bother or offend me to tolerate bigoted assholes. I'll engage with them but overall i just pity them.

Give someone enough rope and they'll hang themself.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 09:33 AM   #21
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We have rules. Fair rules. Pretty clear cut rules. You break the rules there’s consequences. It’s called being an adult and taking responsibility for what you say and do. This was not a heavy handed action. It’s the result of numerous warnings, polite asks to tone it down a bit, etc.
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Old Feb 5, 2022, 09:35 AM   #22
acroig
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Indeed. On that note this one's done.
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